The process of Being the Change will ask you to perform in ways that I couldn’t even begin to imagine as I write this. Some of those changes will be simple and a snap. Some will be more difficult. Some will make you want to dig in your heels and not move at all. Some may require dynamite.

“If you continue to do what you’ve always done, you’ll continue to get what you’ve always got.” This quotation is all over the internet. It’s referred to as an old adage. I’d love to tell you who said it, but I was not able to pin that down. I did find an alternative to that saying though, and it packs a real punch. “If you continue to do what you’ve always done, you deserve to get what you’ve always got.”

It seems obvious to me that if you want something new or different in your life, you are going to have to do something differently. And since it’s your life, you get to decide what to do, how much to do it, when to do it, and how to do it. I can provide pointers, but the ultimate decision is always yours. Are you up for it, or is your inside revving up right now to do the backwards dash?

There are ideas rampaging through your mind right now I suspect. You would probably like to know how far out of your comfort zone you’ll be asked to step? Only as far as you want to go. You would probably like to know how intensely you have to work on those areas where you say you’d like to change? Only as intensely as you want to work. You are the pace car of your life and although many folks may have tried to “make” you do things, ultimately it’s you who says Yes or No.

You may be feeling fear right now. You might be hearing a tiny little voice that is listing all the “What ifs…” that you can think of to scare yourself with. It might be telling you that you’re okay just the way you are, so why create more work for yourself? It might be telling you that you won’t get the message – that you won’t understand what you need to do to change. Fear  needs to be quieted down.

You could be on a teeter-totter right vacillating between “Yes, I want to change and I can” or “I’m feeling afraid I’ll make a fool out of myself and fail.”  It’s been my experience in Being the Change that once you decide to move with forward progress and actually do the thing you are most afraid of, you turn back in wonderment at why you ever balked because the thing you feared has become so small and unimportant.  The feeling of fear disappears and your forward progress accelerates.

I’d like to share a story with you to make the point. During the early 1940’s, a tiny woman (under five foot tall) gave birth to a twelve pound son. This baby could not be pacified by her breast milk nor by formula in bottles. So the doctors instructed the nurses to feed this newborn mashed sardines. That’s amazing. The baby was filled up, quit crying and was soon resting peacefully. I’m confident this would not be recommended today, and yet, the child thrived.

The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends feeding solids to babies between the ages of four and six months. Remember, these foods replace breast milk, which has more nutrition for the baby than the solid foods. By the age of four months, your baby will be producing saliva to aid in the digestion of solids. His throat muscles will be matured enough to swallow whole food. Until four months, your baby won’t have a way to tell you he’s had enough, as he can by simply stopping sucking when he’s breast feeding.

Some moms believe that solid foods will help the baby sleep through the night. I know you’re tired, but there is no scientific proof that early introduction of solids helps babies to sleep. We’ve all had to tough it out, but you will decrease your own milk production that you baby really needs by introducing solids too early in his life.

By the time your baby is six or seven months old, he will need to eat solid foods to help develop eating and chewing skills. You will be able to know when is the best time to begin feeding solids by looking for the same symptoms your pediatrician looks for:

• The baby is between four and six months old and had doubled the birth weight.
• The baby weighs around thirteen to fifteen pounds.
• Your baby is sitting up with light support.
• He can turn his head to refuse food.
• She breastfeeds up to ten times in a 24-hour period and wants more or
• She drinks up to 40 ounces of formula in a 24-hour period and wants more.
• She drinks or nurses more frequently than previously.
• He can place an object in his mouth.
• His sleeping periods are becoming shorter vs. longer

Which foods should be introduced first? Again, common sense plays a role here. My assistant’s grandson sucked on dill pickle slices at age four months because he was teething and inconsolable except by that cold pickle slice. Cereals are generally the first foods introduced. Next, mashed fruits and vegetables are generally recommended: bananas, avocado, sweet potato, and yogurt.

Babies begin by only taking in a few teaspoons. This is normal. They are getting used to the flavor and texture of the new foods, and their intake will vary due to the quantity of milk they get while nursing.

As the baby’s mother, using your common sense, knowing your baby, and weighing the input of your pediatrician, you will arrive at a plan of introducing solid foods that works well for your child. Feeding solids to your baby starts a whole new chapter in their lives.

Family Strengths

Having a healthy and strong family revolves around skills involving communication, contentment, past and future history, humor, becoming resilient, self esteem, unification, family values, positive thinking and spirituality.  It would make a wonderful family discussion to toss these ten topics into the dinner hour and formulate with your family standards that you may not yet have considered or may not have taught your family. As them:  “What would it take to elevate our standards up a notch from where we are right now?”

Communication

Actually, although communication is a wonderful skill, I really prefer the word ‘dialog.’ I think of dialog as dangling any idea out in front of the family and permitting all ideas about it to be discussed, even those not everyone agrees upon.  Honor the individual who presents the different take.  He could be raising your vision.  Open communication fosters trust between you and your children and helps you to support them lovingly.

Stress

The demands within the family and the demands on the family from without (work, school, church) tend to create stress.  We have this fantasy that a strong family should be stress free.  Well, yes, if everyone stays in bed all day!  But in normal, active families, stress happens and you can teach one another to cope.  Make daily lists and communicate them. Know you don’t have to get it all done immediately. Look at your housekeeping rules again – too strict?  Pat family members on the back for tasks partially completed.  Put the cell phone away and devote your attention to your kids.

Working

Everyone in the family works.  The children’s work is school work.  Dad’s work is his employment.  Mom’s work may be employment or being a stay-at-home mom.  Whatever your work role is, you also have a work role in the family and in this role, everyone is taught to cooperate and participate.  This work should be distributed across the entire family.  If you have younger children who might balk, they don’t balk at playing games, so turn the work into a game.

Discipline

We arrive at adulthood as a result of completing childhood and we drag along those things from childhood we did not like.  Discipline is one of those ideas.  We did not like being told “No” when we were children.  Try to find a way to always say “Yes” to your child, like, “Yes, you can go play once the trash is emptied.” They will remember that “yes.”  Gentle firmness is required for discipline that is reasonable.  Children are more secure when there is reasonable discipline because it establishes boundaries for them. Remember, discipline means teaching, not bull whip.

Healthy Eating

The main idea behind eating is “enjoyment.” Encouraging your family to enjoy a wide variety of foods is a great idea.  I know one mom who told her sons “You only have to taste one teaspoon of this food. I’d be unhappy to think your tastes have changed and you missed out on enjoying it, because it’s really yummy.”  Her sons now relish most foods.

There are many other areas that promote a strong family experience.  Remember, family strength is built using many family skills.  We’d like to hear yours below.  Please leave us your comment.

Sterilization is important when canning, so be sure to follow instructions and don’t improvise. There are two methods for canning and each one has different equipment needs.

Acidic foods like tomatoes, fruits or fruit juices, jams and pickles are canned using the boiling water method.  All you’d need for this is a rather large pot that can hold your canning jars while they are boiled for the recommended time.

Preserving vegetables, meat, or beans uses the pressure canning method where the canning jars are placed in two to three inches of water and boiled under pressure to destroy the microorganism Clostridium botulinum. Important Note: If pressure canning is not used, botulism can result.

Other necessary canning equipment:

• Mason Canning jars in a variety of sizes
• Two piece self-sealing jar lids
• A Jar Lifter
• A Canning Funnel
• General Kitchen tools like wooden spoons, measuring cups, etc.
• A Large Pan and/or A Pressure Canner
• Hot Pads

You can find information about canning at the U.S. Food and Agriculture Department, your local College Cooperative Extension Services and major food processing equipment manufactures.

Once you go through your learning process and the purchase of needed equipment, it’s time to decide which foods you want to can.  Fruits? Vegetables? Meats? Poultry? Seafood?  There are many websites dedicated to canning food recipes and  you’ll enjoy selecting from their wide variety. Here’s a great site for beginners.

Canning Fruits

Only purchase or pick fruits that are perfectly ripe and not over ripe.  You’ll need to get them canned within the three hour period following picking. Wash the fruit to remove dirt, sand or any chemicals they may have been sprayed with. Research the cold pack or the hot syrup method to choose your preference. Be sure to leave enough head space in the jar above the fruit before you put the lid on.

Canning Vegetables

You’ll need to choose which vegetables you want to can from a wide variety of choices:  corn, green beans, tomatoes, onions, peas and carrots, or just carrots alone. Using the internet will provide hundreds of recipes for pickles and peppers as well.

It might be interesting to create a Canning Club with your friends to spread the cost of equipment, to spread the research for the learning cycle of canning basics across several of you, and to have fun preparing the food at your get-togethers.  You might create a Home Canning Guide from your learning experience that could be commercially viable.

Using Books On The Treadmill

It’s boring, I know. I also know that if you focus on the walking itself during exercise, put the book aside, you’ll get more benefits of the exercise. Try alternating fast and slow walking. Push your self a bit and you’ll get more out of the walking. And while you’re walking, think: “My exercise makes me feel healthy.”

When Should You Stretch?

Many folks advocate stretching before your workout, but your flexibility or range of motion for performance is somewhat of an old wives tale, lacks scientific support and doesn’t seem to have any correlation about decreasing injury. doing a warm-up, however, might be beneficial.

Room Temperature or Cold Water?

The internet is amazing! I found substantial arguments for drinking room temperature water vs. drinking cold water after a workout. What’s important is that you re-hydrate yourself and for my money, I’d drink the temperature of water you enjoy the most, since the so-called experts don’t seem to be in agreement on this one. One recommendation was to put a pinch of salt in the water to rejuvenate electrolytes in your body.

How Often Should You Exercise?

Again, there are as many opinions as there are experts. The frequency of workout depends on you.  What makes you feel worked out? How often do you feel the need to workout? Daily? Three times a week? Weekly? One internet expert said once a month was enough. What matters is figuring out what is optimal for you. This will take trial and error. You’re worth it.

Use the Same Routine Forever?

This is a topic on which there seems to be some concurrence. The mind is an incredible machine and it runs the body. If the mind does the same routine, it will begin to create short cuts, so it seems wise to vary your workout routine to trick the mind (and thus, the body) even if it’s just to keep your motivation strong. Even changing the music you to which you workout can keep your motivation high.

Exercising for Weight Loss

The connection between weight loss and working out hard and frequently can be helpful temporarily, but if you neglect to look at what you’re thinking while you’re doing this exercising, the weight loss can be reversed when you stop exercising with such intensity. You are thinking “I want to lose weight” and it’s this activity that drives the weight loss along with your belief that exercising is helping. By connecting these two ideas, if you stop the intense exercising, you also stop thinking “lose weight” and lo and behold, you stop losing weight. This is a common exercise myth. The mental component is too frequently not examined, and it should be.

Activity and exercise – any kind of movement, actually – can help you think “I am healthy” and this applies to people of any age. Stay active, keep doing your fitness program and you’ll stay healthy.

Three short inspirational, encouraging words:

Please let go.

The magnificent mind called Albert Einstein said “Logic will get you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere.” I’d like to explore the subject of imagination and offer you some stimulating ideas to either kick start your own imagination or refine the way you are currently using it so that you can enjoy more in your life.

It’s been said that you cannot solve today’s problems using yesterday’s mind that created them, and this makes it patently obvious to me that if you want to solve your problems, you have to change the way you think.  This is where imagination comes in to play – and “play” is a big part of what is required.

Your mentality is limitless. It has no borders, no walls, no rules – nothing that can stop it from thinking whatever you choose to think as enormous as you choose to think it. Imagination is the one activity mind has where this limitlessness should be coddled and indulged, because it is the one tool that can create for you whatever you most dream about.

If you consciously direct your mind to think about the ways in which you’d like to enjoy more health, more wealth, greater success, bettered relationships, you will change your old blueprints and plans into new ones to stretch your imagination and you will then have a new reality.

About Focus

Imagination is always at the ready whenever you are. But since fleeting thoughts produce fleeting results, you have to engage your imagination in a focused manner. Focus, concentrate, and be determined that you will persevere in the manifesting of your dreams and then enjoy the life you’d like to. Renew your commitment in writing weekly at a minimum to keep yourself focused and moving forward.

About Refinement

I can see the good in life.  The good that I see now extends far beyond the original picture I once had of it.  I allowed the power of imagination to stretch my concepts to the next good thing, and the one after that.  You can do this, too.  Think of one small good thing you’d like.  Hold that thought and take the steps to make it manifest.  Now ask yourself “What more can I do with this?” Stretch your imagination to tell you what those next steps are and then take them.

About Excuses

Be on the lookout for you telling yourself “Yes, but….”   Listen to see if you are offering yourself excuses for why you won’t, can’t, didn’t have what you truly want.  I don’t think you should permit excuses any more.  I don’t think you should short-change yourself. When you find yourself making excuses, say “No, let’s find a solution for what looks like a blockage.”  Let your imagination bring up a solution.

About Being Cause

You, your mind thinking, and your imagination imagining, is what is causing your experiences. When you know this, you are a mental millionaire, because you can use this information to manifest your dreams, your wishes and your desires.  This is how I have become successful.  There are no overnight successes.  What appears to be an overnight success is one individual, dreaming his dreams imaginatively, and then taking the steps to make those dreams come true. When Zubin Mehta steps onto the stage and charms us with the beauty of his skill with his violin, don’t forget the dozens of years he imagined and practiced to get on to that stage!

Ten Steps for Using Imagination

My dream is for you to achieve all of your dreams.  Here are ten steps you can take using imagination to make your own dreams come true:

Write down as full a picture as you can think of to make your Big Dream manifest.
Think of five action steps you can take to begin to make that happen.
Spend time each day allowing your imagination to frolic around the ideas you have about your Big Dream and see what refinements show up.
Determine not to ever quit.
Use concentration and focus to continue taking steps forward.
Meditate daily about your processing and let imagination show you more – what next steps you can take.
Expect this to take a little time.  Exercise patience as you move forward.
Forgive yourself for setbacks and resolve to re-start toward your goals again.
Believe that you can do it.  Allow a mentor to help you move forward.
Know that “If it’s going to be, it’s up to me” as P. Quimby said.
It’s wise at this point to remember that Imagination has no limitations other than the ones  you inadvertently add.  Be on the lookout for limitations that you may be adding as frosting to keep your cake small and replace those limiting thoughts with “Yes, I can!”  You are deserving.  You are good enough to achieve your own dreams.  You are fully capable. All of your dreams can be made manifest one at a time. This is the secret I used to manifest my own dreams, and I’d like to think that soon, using these same secrets, you’ll be telling me your success stories too.
Your Imagination is the Power.  Your dreams are the raw ingredients.  If you think them, you press them out into your experience from inside your good Self. What could be more powerful than this? That is how the power of imagination works.

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” Howard Thurman

“You see things; and you say, ‘Why?’ But I dream things that never were; and I say, ‘Why not?’” George Bernard Shaw

You can best  “Emotional Coach” your child by first understanding your reactions.

How do you deal with your child’s feelings? Are you uncomfortable if his emotions are negative? Does his sadness make you uncomfortable or angry? Does his emotion make you feel out of control? Looking back in your life and discovering why you feel as you do. Look backwards at how your parents handled your emotions. Have you adopted their methods? The following attitudes will make you a great Emotional Coach.

• You value your child’s feelings even if you don’t appreciate their actions.
• You permit your child to experience his emotions as valuable.
• You see negative emotions as an opportunity to grow, become closer and teach him problem solving.
• You work to understand his feelings because they are so important.

My child’s negative emotions help me teach him and become closer to him. Encourage your child to talk about his feelings, classify them, and know that you understand him.  This will help you establish closeness. If your child doesn’t understand what’s being taught to him at school, let him vent his frustrations and assure him that you understand how he feels.  Then, help him gain the necessary understanding he didn’t get at school.  You’ll both be closer to one another and he’ll progress with his school work.

Walk a Mile in His Shoes Using Empathetic Listening. This is the key skill of Emotion Coaching. If you want to learn Empathetic Listening, use your eyes, your ears, your imagination, your words and your heart to let your child know his feelings and desires are perfectly acceptable. Watch for evidence of his emotions, like sullen silence.  Listen for the messages lying beneath his words. Try to imagine how they must be feeling. Say what you see or hear in non-judgmental words. Feel what he’s feeling in your own heart.

Teach Your Child The Name of His Emotions. Using your observations, name the emotion your child is experiencing, because they don’t know what the emotion is in the early days of their lives. Labeling can help your child recover more quickly from a powerful surge of emotion he’s not experienced before. It’s not useful to tell your child what he should feel.  It’s enough to identify what he is feeling.

Explore Possible Solutions. Consistent follow through with consequences for behavior make a child feel secure. Teach your child what the limits are. Find out what your child was trying to accomplish. Let him offer other solutions before you do. If his solutions aren’t workable, ask questions that will show him what might happen when he gives them a try. Some questions you might ask are:

• “Does this solution seem fair to you?”
• “How will this solution work?
• “How are you likely to feel? How are other people likely to feel?

You might see that your child’s solution won’t work.  It’s sometimes better to let him go through with it for the sake of his learning.

By using these emotional intelligence coaching techniques, you can develop your child’s maturity and success in life experiences.

We all spend a lot of time in front of our computer monitors squinting.  When we squint, we don’t blink normally, so our eyes don’t get the right amount of moisture they need.  Here are ways you can alleviate the dry eye problems associated with staring at your monitor all day:

• Adjust your monitor so that your eyes look down at it and there is no glare.
• Look away into the distance every 15 minutes to sharpen your ability to read.
• Get up and walk away from your monitor occasionally.
• Blink consciously to keep your eyes moistened.

Just being aware of the time and taking short breaks can do a lot to alleviate computer eye strain.

Your moods are just a collection of your feelings that you’ve indulged habitually.  The nice thing about knowing your mood is just a feeling is this:  feelings follow thoughts, so if you can govern your thoughts, you can also govern the subsequent feelings. You can consciously choose to think “Each time I slide into old moods, nothing happens; so when I feel that old mood coming on, I’m going to take the opposite stand and get moving!”  Once you’re in action, the old mood fades away in a wisp of smoke.

Remember the law that said basically:

Mind’s desire leads to action (thinking) and action leads to results.

Once you get physically active, your mind will dwell on the end result rather than dwelling on your old “I don’t feel like it” mood.  You will find yourself looking forward to some successful outcome. I know there are really times when you truly “don’t feel like it.”  This may be because you are tired from a long day’s work.  Being tired is a different situation than hiding behind those words through fear or procrastination.  As I said, those words have many meanings.

The “I” of you prefers to be taking action steps forward though, so give yourself permission to become active despite your moods and feelings. You can make an agreement with yourself that every time you hear yourself saying “I don’t feel like it” you’ll get into action instead.

Just take one action step. By the time you’ve taken your first action step, your mood will generally change, and then you’ll be able to take the next step and the one after that.  You’ll be able to see the end result of your actions and “I don’t feel like it” will have become an excuse of the past.  You’ll be more focused on your success rather than on that old saying.

Act In Spite of Your Mood
“I don’t ‘feel’ like it”, is a common chant we often say to ourselves or to others when we’re tired, not in the mood, or simply procrastinating. No doubt feelings are important and need to be acknowledged, yet at the same time, they often prevent us from taking the action we need to take, at the time we need to take it. Consequently, in the end, because we didn’t do what we needed to do, we tend to feel worse.

It takes courage to act regardless of your current mood. It’s easy to succumb to your feelings. But remember, your feelings come from your thoughts, and you have the power to change your thoughts. When you change your thoughts, you will change the way you feel. Instead of focusing on how you’re not in the mood, focus on the benefit of completing whatever needs to get done. Focus on how you’ll feel when you’re finished and how proud you’ll be of yourself for acting in spite of not being in the perfect mood.

Utilize the “law of momentum” which states that, “A body at rest tends to remain at rest while a body in motion tends to remain in motion”. In short, get into motion! Remember, moods are a product of the “mind”. The trick is simple: don’t think, just do it! Train yourself to “get started” even if you’re not in the mood. Moods tend to quickly dissipate once you’re in action.

Whenever you don’t “feel” like it, check in with your current thoughts. What are you thinking that is resulting in this feeling? Then simply change your thoughts. Remember, action generally comes from your higher self, the part of you that is for growth and expansion. Inaction generally comes from your protective mind, the part of you that tries to keep you stuck in your comfort zone. When you act in spite of your mood, you are choosing to manage and control your mind instead of letting it control you!

So the next time you’re not feeling “in the mood”, either change your thinking or simply say to your mind, “thank you for sharing”. Then focus on only taking one of the first action steps to get started, then take another, and another. One step at a time until the law of momentum kicks in. By then, chances are you’ll forget all about your moody behavior and will be well on your way to completing whatever it was you needed to do…and your moods will not have gotten the better of you.